1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
2. Movie nudity is virtually always female.
3. You know stuff about tanks.
4. A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase.
5. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
6. You can open all your own jam jars.
7. Old friends don't give a damn if you've gained or lost weight.
8. You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing.
9. Your butt is never a factor in job interviews.
10. If your 34 and single nobody even notices.
11. You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
12. Your last name stays put.
13. Same work……….more pay !
14. You can kill your own food.
15. The garage is all yours.
16. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
17. Not liking a person won't stop you from having great sex with them.
18. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack.
19. Baywatch.
20. Everything on your face gets to stay it's original colour.
21. You don't have to shave below your neck.
22. You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
23. Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.
24. Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you're in the room.
25. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.
26. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
27. You don't care whether anyone notices your new haircut.
28. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.
29. You never have to drive on to another gas station because this ones too yucky.
30. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So notice anything different?"
31. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
32. You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because your not in the mood.
33. If another guy turns up at a party wearing the same outfit, you might just become life long buddies.
34. If something mechanical doesn't work, you can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room.
35. You can but condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.

5 Reasons why it SUCKS to be a Man!!

1. External Genitalia are vulnerable to knees and fastballs.
2. Even if you get your head stuck in an industrial wood chipper, you're not allowed to cry.
3. Ribbed for her pleasure - not yours.
4. You can't flirt your way out of a jam.
5. "Women and children first".